Post by The B-Witch on Oct 15, 2011 12:48:43 GMT -5
*In a secret lab within the equally secert midtown headquarters of the clique...the founder and self-appointed leader of the organization....watches Hard Core's new report while he works on the final phase of his latest scheme.*
Tonigh's top headlines.....halloween or halloscheme? Halloween had gone from a deep seeded time of darksacrafice to the harvest god to the gentle and fun time of children of all ages dressing up as whomever they wished to be. However over the past decade in Halloween has become a time of concern and fear. And not because of the dressed up goblins that stalk the streets in search of candy or the next big party. The fear comes from one of the planets most devious criminals....the Schemer.
The Schemer is the leader of one of the world most deadly groups of terrorists.....the so-called clique. A collection of mutants bent on overthrowing human society. For reasons known only to the Schemer...and some of his more trusted confederates....the Clique seems to take personal enjoyment of making attempts to launch attacks on certain holidays. Halloween seems to be the most popular time for them to strike. For ten straight years some sinister Scheme has been put forth.
Do to this fact....the mayor has called in the national guard to help watch over manhattan this halloween. Also various individual and teams of super heroes have agreed to help.....
*The Schemer shutdown the sound as he continued work on his latest holiday ploy.* Cretins....you can bring in anyone you want!! Nothing...nobody will stop...............THIS!!!!
*Something withn a piece of tin foil wrapping the size of silver dollar lay of a examination table before him. And as the Schemer powered devices in his lab....manical laughter issues forth....and echoed through the corridors of the building.....letting all know....yes...he was at it again. Another halloween scheme was nearing completion.*
--
Both girls look up hearing the laughter, wondering if their father had left the PA system on in his lab again...as he was prone to do to make sure everyone could hear his mysterious machinations. Though not nearly as annoying when he left the intercom on in the bathroom that one day.
"I wonder what dad's doing now. He's got that creepy laugh thing going on again...all mad scientist-like."
I'm guessing we're not going to have that Halloween party this year.
"We didn't have one last year...remember the movie monsters?"
How could I forget...poor big monster, he was just missunderstood.
"Better than zombies I guess. I'm still not even sure why I remember those."
Better than clowns, I suppose.
Mia nods, then motions for her sister to come with her to go spy on what their father was working on in his lab.
--
“I don’t know… what did you want to be?” she said with a soft smile before she bit her lip. Her precious phone was tucked tightly against her ear as she thought about all the couples costumes she could participate in before she heard… it.
“Yeah, that’s what it is… one of those older scary movies on TV where you can totally see the monster’s zipper in the back… Alright then… you think on it and call me if you think of something else? Mmmkay… bye.” She said, clicking the phone shut and sighing. Maniacal laughter could only mean one thing… she was not going to get to be sexy nurse to Green Arrow’s doctor…
--
Lark has made it back Manhattan after 'accidentally' being left behind in Vegas when the clique flew back to New York at the conclusion of the supervillain awards. She only had 100 dollars to her name. Not enough for the first class ticket she required. She was not about to fly coach. So she decided to take her chances on the slot machines so that she could win enough to fly home in style.
Down to her last of amercan dollars the slot paid off big and the lovely lark won 200 thousand dollars. It was just enough to buy the necessities of life. Two expensive chiffon dresses. Another that was ocean blue and made of a lovely lace design. Matching diamond necklaces to go with each of them. A new car that would be shipped back to Manhattan for her. Afterward she had just enough left over for that first class ticket back to New York.
She arrives at the mansion in time to hear her father cackling. She knows that cackling well.
"Halloween already? No! He is not ruining my halloween again! I want to drss up and have fun this year! Or watch a movie! I say we watch lord of the rings!"
Her eyes glaze over over in thought as she recalls the key phrase of the movies.
"Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky, Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone, Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie. One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them, One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie."
Lark stops in the hall lost for moment in the middle earth.
--
*A button on his fedora is pressed and a pair of tinted lens appear over the eye slits of his mask.....protecting them from what is to come. Once those are in place....levers are pulled on strange looking machines. Buttons are pressed....switches are thrown. In a scene resembling an old Frankenstein mad doctor's lab....the Schemer's own lab comes to life with flashes and sparks. Electrical devices hum and crackle to life. Energy beams strike the small tin foil wrapping of his latest creation...infusing it with a strange electro-magnetic wavelength.*
Perfect...absolutely perfect! This time....I'll pull off the greatest Halloween caper ever!!
*More manical laughter ensued.....then...as it faded....he telepathically sensed the presences of others....and the concerns of some. He would address this now.*
Come forth my children...you are curious?? You have questions...come forth...I shall explain.
--
FLIP THE SWITCH! She grins a bit, mimicking maniacal laughter.
"You're nuts, Hattie..." Mia nudges her sister before both of them walk in further, looking over the various devices. "Is that where my stash of York Peppermint patties went?"
I told you I didn't eat them...besides, mom bought you more anyway.
"True." Mia rolls up the costume catalog and tucks it into her pocket and looks back to the door, seeing her other sister sibling...and the unhinged songbird coming.
"Mornin Alyssa."
--
“Ladies.” She greets Hattie and Mia brightly before she notices who else they were greeting and she frowns a little. “…Lark.” She says dryly, not wanting to be rude, but at the same time, she really can’t hide her disappointment.
--
She seems to return from a far away place as thoughts of middle earth fade. She hears her father talking to her and sighs. It sucks having a telepathic daddy sometimes. He is always one step ahead.
"She sees her sisters arriving at the lab and bounces forward to greet them. Mattie! Hattie! Alyssa! Hi! Hi! Did you miss me?"
The sexy siren of soho notices ordered food sitting out. She has not eaten dinner so she will step in and help herself. But before getting her well deserved share she sees that the pizza that has been ordered has come from a take out place she has previously requested her daddy not order from. This sets her off on one of her rants.
"Daddy, you ordered from Vito's again. I told you we should not order from there. I was out jogging and checked. It's close to a mile away. You order from there 8 or ten times a year. Do you know how much gas they use to bring that here? I'll tell you how much. Lots. That's doing damage to the ozone layers and everything. I hope you can live with yourself. I hope you can sleep at night knowing how much damage to the ozone layer, Daddy.
Next time order pizza from that Chinese place across the street. We can get it ourselves without driving and save the planet. Some genius you are daddy. Can't even order a pizza by yourself. Genius. Big whoop. You haven't even conquered the planet yet. I've been here 14 years and you've not conquered earth yet. So stupid.
The flashing sparks of the machines die down and Lark looks to her sisters for answers.
"He is at it again isn't he? Another Halloween scheme?"
--
*The Schemer powered down the machines....confident he had successfully created to perfect formula to use in his latest Halloween caper.*
It's perfect. Beyond all expectations!! This foil wrapped substance will give us exactly what I need to outwit so-called defenders of justice!! Nothing will stop it!!
*As the devices in his lab grew still....the sinister Schemer turned to face his daughters....greeting them with a smile of satisfaction.*
Ahhh...my darling Alyssa!! so heavenly to see you. And you my twins of evil!! You've come here to share in daddy's triumph? And Lark....not even you insane banter can bother me this evening. Help yourself to pizza...and my peppermint patties, girls. And then sit...I'll tell you of this latest scheme....then if you like...we'll watch a movie together.
--
"Hi Jess."
Morning Lady Larksalot.
Mia grabs a handful of the peppermint patties, then backs up to sit on one of the counters, Hattie takes a slice of pizza, figuring mom wasn't at home to scold her for eating it for breakfast.
"So...tin foil will foil heroes plans?"
Seems like things are all wrapper-ed up then, right? We can have a Halloween party?
"It candy fail?"
--
"Lady Larksalot! I like that! I so heart you two."
She is less charitable to her daddy.
"You are so not ruining Halloween for me. I am so not being turned into Zombie. I hate brains. I don't have any I hate them so much. Then that stupid Scheme where you turned all the kids to little Schemers/ That was totally disturbed. And lets not forget the famous pumpkins that going to unleash knockout gas on everyone then we could rob the city blind. How's that working for you, genius? Not so well as I recall. No what have you got? Killer candy? How is this going to help us take over?
--
*The Schemer sneered at his dopey daughter as she brought up several failed Halloween schemes from the past.*
the schemer children were not my fault....Landis created them. As for the pumpkins...I forgot people put candles in their jack o'lanterns...it overheated the control for the knockout gas. A simple oversight....it could have happened to anyone. As for the zombie scheme....that was Spectrum's fault...if that photonic floozie had hadn't interfered it would have worked perfectly.
But this Scheme won't fail. *He glanced at the twins,* No Halloween party yet. But we'll be celebrating soon! This caper is too sweet to miss. And yes....this tin foil will foil all who oppose us. For with is a special candy that will make life sweet for us!!
*more maniacal laughter ensued.*
--
"Soooo....special foil plus special candy equals world domination?"
Yes...yes...Hershey's has known this all along... KISSES WILL CONQUER THE WORLD!
"You so stole my bag of patties, Hattie." Mia chuckles, shaking her head before eating another.
I'm suddenly both relieved and worried that your other Halloween plans have failed, father? Schemer children? Knockout gas that wasn't heat tested?
--
"Why can't we just have a nice normal Halloween, daddy? No Schemes. We can have party and dress up. Or take Mattie and Hattie house to house so they can candy. Or go find a pumpkin patch that's really sincere and wait for the great pumpkin.
Or we can watch a movie. Something scary. Not like that those idiots you like to watch.
Like that guy from the original series that captain Jerk. He spends more time running after woman than he does running his ship. Then he leaves that poor vulcan guy mister spook to clean up his mess.
Spook. Do a sensor sweep of that M class planet we're appoarching. Scan for female lifeforms. Maybe there'll be someone there I can have sex with. Spook. You and the rest of the crew save the whales in the 20th century. I'll be busy seeing if I can have sex with the lady that runs the aquarium. Spook. This green lady is trying to hit me with a paternity suit. Use a vulcan mind meld on her and make her forget.
I don't even know why they call that show Star Trek. They should rename it space-prev.
But he's not even the worst captain. That Captain pickacard from next generation is worse. He's always in trouble. Oh help me, help me! the cardassians captured me and they're torturing me. Oh help me, help me. The borg captured me and are making me kill millions of people. Oh help me, help me. I'm stuck in ten forward and the baryon sweep is coming.
He's just a helpless old man. He should be in a wheel chair not the captain's chair. No wonder he played professor Xavier. At least that casting department knew his true calling.
Then there's loser from deep space nine, Captain crisco. He was so lame he didn't even get a ship of his own for the first three seasons of the show. Then what does he do? He leaves his command and his son behind to go hang out with some loser aliens that live in the entrance to the gamma quandrant. Creep. Nothing but dead beat dad if you ask me.
Then there's that very *friendly* person form Voyager, Captain subway. The federation give her one job. Find commander peyote and bust up the maquis. So what does she do? She finds that root chewing punk and makes him her first officer. Way to follow orders, subway! Then she's so retarded she ends up getting her ship lost in the delta sonic. How stupid is that?
Then there's that Captain Archway from enterprise. Loser! That's all I am saying. Loser!
Oh well, I guess watching that junk is better than those stupid Star wars movies with that Mankin Skywalker. He's a piece of work. Leaves his pregnant wife and for what? Not even some sexy biatch. He goes for some dried up walnut looking old man, emperor Ovaltine. Couple of sick sickos there.
And then there's that guy from the first set of movies, Hand Solo. Like that doesn't tell you what he's up to on those long voyages between star systems. Who's he kidding? Disgusting. And they show this porno stuff to children! You showed it to my sisters Mattie and Hattie, daddy. I hope you can live with yourself. I hope you can sleep at night knowing what you exposed your young daughters too.
--
*the Schemer merely glared at his daughter Jessica.* there's nothing wrong with Star Trek...or Star Wars. they are both brilliant...unlike you my dear Lark. You simply lack the mental ability to enjoy such grand production values. No shut up and listen.
We don't do normal Halloweens. Those are for human fools. We are above such mundane traditions. It's our job to wipe away the old and bring forth the new. A new era where mutants rule the earth and we the clique rule mutants. And this little candy treat is going to help us.
You see....I've manage to create here....the ultimate alcohol laden candy. Testing won't show the taint....I've disguised the taint to well. Fact is...you eat this candy....and it delivers a blast to your liver....so to speak It becomes pure alcohol within the system of those that eat it. 10 times greater than the legal limit. Enough to cause even the most sober person to pass out. In other words....I've created what man has long for over the centuries....a good fifty cent drunk!!
--
"Soooo...we're going to get a bunch of kids drunk enough to cause serious alcohol poisoning?"
Eww. Kids could die if they eat candy? That's all levels of wrong, dad.
Mia looks at the pattie she was about to eat and double checks to make sure it didn't have one of her father's sinister snack wrappers on it.
Hattie just takes another bite of her pizza, wondering what made her father come up with this novel idea.
--
Lark frowns when he daddy tells her to shut up but when she hears what her father has in mind.
"That's mean. So totally mean. You could hurt people, daddy. Maybe kids. It's so not right. The twins are right. You should dump this stupid plan and use the money for something else. Like giving it to me!"
She munches on her pizza with one and leans on the wall with the other.
"So what happens if kids eat this and get sick daddy. Do you have an antidote? I don't want anyone dying. "
There is a ring at the door Lark goes to answer it.
"That's for me. I will be right back."
And she is back in just a few minutes after paying the delivery man at the door and having the robot helpers bring in two large crates.
--
It's not mean!! Who care what happens to a bunch of apple pinching street human kids. they tend to grow up into adults. And adult humans are our natural foe. They must be wiped out...or at least controlled to make the won't do the same to us!!
*He looks to his two darling daughters Mia and Hattie.*
Surely you both can understand.
*After the ring at the doorbell....the schemer merely shook his head. Lark was up to something...and when she arrived with the crates, he was cert*
What the devil is this?? How are dare you upstage me!
--
"How do we know only human children will eat them? Is the package going to say 'Only safe for human consumption'?"
I think Mom would have smacked you for endangering children, dad.
Both girls raise a brow as their considerably Larky sister rushes from the room to answer the door.
"Can you tell what it is, Hattie?"
Not really...I'm just picking up big boxes. Maybe we can send her to Atlantis in one of them...
They turn their attention back towards their father, Mia setting the candy back down, not really wanting to test it anymore...thinking a drunk superhuman would not be a good thing, instead she grabs a piece of pizza and flicks the olives off of it before taking a bite.
Hattie moves over to her father's computer and starts skimming through the information as to figure out how exactly the candy worked.
--
Because I intend on warning all clique within the clique not to touch the stuff....and I'm hoping that before I begin the mass production process....I can make it have little or no effect on mutants.....thus sparing anyone a nasty headache in the morning...or worse. But then I can't exactly heed FDA regulations on this one now can I? Then the jig...as they say...would be up.
*His gaze shifted toward Hattie.* What are you doing?? Be careful.....there's information on that computer I've not saved to an independent disc yet.
--
"Just warning the Clique? I'm sure Boomer wouldn't eat the candy, she's trying to keep her slim figure. As far as the FDA, there's nothing saying they won't try to test it...just call it an import from Europe, or even more sense, China and people won't even notice probably. Do you have multiple flavors, or are you just sticking with...you know, chocolate?"
Mia moves over and picks at the wrapped candy, looking it over.
I'm looking over the chemical instances that you have on the candy, father. It's not like I intend on changing the chemical make up...or start deleting things at random to foil the plot before it can even begin. Though, I did set the auto-backup system on here to transmit the information to the portable flash drive sitting over there on the counter.
She motions over to the drive with the little green blinking light on it.
--
*the Schemer was impressed with how the twins seemed so quick to adapt to the mode of scheming. Clearly there were big things in their future.*
Auto-backup....good thinking!! Boomer was already involved in one of my past Halloween schemes. Her family did not take kindly to it. Spoiled sports. As for the candy itself....oh yes...I have multiple flavors. Spearmint...peppermint....so far those....I'm considering others. Is there anything you can think of darlings....and flavor you would prefer??
The formula I used is on file, Mia. *He points to a computer terminal with a green fedora screen saver.* It's listed in there under the file....punch drunk.
--
"Honestly, if you wanted it to target the more adult human crowd, I would think it...punny, to put it in butterscotch candies."
Hattie shakes her head at her sister's comment, then skims over the Punch drunk file, snickering silently as she reads the info. Punch drunk on butterscotch. Well, I don't know many kids that eat the butterscotch candies, well, besides me. But if you do only minty flavors, you would limit the number of kids eating them on that notion alone.
"It would have to be something that can be eaten quickly I'd think...though, sucking on a butterscotch would deliver it slowly to allow the drunkenness to build, as opposed to stuffing one's face with chocolate as some are prone to do." Mia eyes her sister a bit.
Tonigh's top headlines.....halloween or halloscheme? Halloween had gone from a deep seeded time of darksacrafice to the harvest god to the gentle and fun time of children of all ages dressing up as whomever they wished to be. However over the past decade in Halloween has become a time of concern and fear. And not because of the dressed up goblins that stalk the streets in search of candy or the next big party. The fear comes from one of the planets most devious criminals....the Schemer.
The Schemer is the leader of one of the world most deadly groups of terrorists.....the so-called clique. A collection of mutants bent on overthrowing human society. For reasons known only to the Schemer...and some of his more trusted confederates....the Clique seems to take personal enjoyment of making attempts to launch attacks on certain holidays. Halloween seems to be the most popular time for them to strike. For ten straight years some sinister Scheme has been put forth.
Do to this fact....the mayor has called in the national guard to help watch over manhattan this halloween. Also various individual and teams of super heroes have agreed to help.....
*The Schemer shutdown the sound as he continued work on his latest holiday ploy.* Cretins....you can bring in anyone you want!! Nothing...nobody will stop...............THIS!!!!
*Something withn a piece of tin foil wrapping the size of silver dollar lay of a examination table before him. And as the Schemer powered devices in his lab....manical laughter issues forth....and echoed through the corridors of the building.....letting all know....yes...he was at it again. Another halloween scheme was nearing completion.*
--
Both girls look up hearing the laughter, wondering if their father had left the PA system on in his lab again...as he was prone to do to make sure everyone could hear his mysterious machinations. Though not nearly as annoying when he left the intercom on in the bathroom that one day.
"I wonder what dad's doing now. He's got that creepy laugh thing going on again...all mad scientist-like."
I'm guessing we're not going to have that Halloween party this year.
"We didn't have one last year...remember the movie monsters?"
How could I forget...poor big monster, he was just missunderstood.
"Better than zombies I guess. I'm still not even sure why I remember those."
Better than clowns, I suppose.
Mia nods, then motions for her sister to come with her to go spy on what their father was working on in his lab.
--
“I don’t know… what did you want to be?” she said with a soft smile before she bit her lip. Her precious phone was tucked tightly against her ear as she thought about all the couples costumes she could participate in before she heard… it.
“Yeah, that’s what it is… one of those older scary movies on TV where you can totally see the monster’s zipper in the back… Alright then… you think on it and call me if you think of something else? Mmmkay… bye.” She said, clicking the phone shut and sighing. Maniacal laughter could only mean one thing… she was not going to get to be sexy nurse to Green Arrow’s doctor…
--
Lark has made it back Manhattan after 'accidentally' being left behind in Vegas when the clique flew back to New York at the conclusion of the supervillain awards. She only had 100 dollars to her name. Not enough for the first class ticket she required. She was not about to fly coach. So she decided to take her chances on the slot machines so that she could win enough to fly home in style.
Down to her last of amercan dollars the slot paid off big and the lovely lark won 200 thousand dollars. It was just enough to buy the necessities of life. Two expensive chiffon dresses. Another that was ocean blue and made of a lovely lace design. Matching diamond necklaces to go with each of them. A new car that would be shipped back to Manhattan for her. Afterward she had just enough left over for that first class ticket back to New York.
She arrives at the mansion in time to hear her father cackling. She knows that cackling well.
"Halloween already? No! He is not ruining my halloween again! I want to drss up and have fun this year! Or watch a movie! I say we watch lord of the rings!"
Her eyes glaze over over in thought as she recalls the key phrase of the movies.
"Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky, Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone, Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie. One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them, One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie."
Lark stops in the hall lost for moment in the middle earth.
--
*A button on his fedora is pressed and a pair of tinted lens appear over the eye slits of his mask.....protecting them from what is to come. Once those are in place....levers are pulled on strange looking machines. Buttons are pressed....switches are thrown. In a scene resembling an old Frankenstein mad doctor's lab....the Schemer's own lab comes to life with flashes and sparks. Electrical devices hum and crackle to life. Energy beams strike the small tin foil wrapping of his latest creation...infusing it with a strange electro-magnetic wavelength.*
Perfect...absolutely perfect! This time....I'll pull off the greatest Halloween caper ever!!
*More manical laughter ensued.....then...as it faded....he telepathically sensed the presences of others....and the concerns of some. He would address this now.*
Come forth my children...you are curious?? You have questions...come forth...I shall explain.
--
FLIP THE SWITCH! She grins a bit, mimicking maniacal laughter.
"You're nuts, Hattie..." Mia nudges her sister before both of them walk in further, looking over the various devices. "Is that where my stash of York Peppermint patties went?"
I told you I didn't eat them...besides, mom bought you more anyway.
"True." Mia rolls up the costume catalog and tucks it into her pocket and looks back to the door, seeing her other sister sibling...and the unhinged songbird coming.
"Mornin Alyssa."
--
“Ladies.” She greets Hattie and Mia brightly before she notices who else they were greeting and she frowns a little. “…Lark.” She says dryly, not wanting to be rude, but at the same time, she really can’t hide her disappointment.
--
She seems to return from a far away place as thoughts of middle earth fade. She hears her father talking to her and sighs. It sucks having a telepathic daddy sometimes. He is always one step ahead.
"She sees her sisters arriving at the lab and bounces forward to greet them. Mattie! Hattie! Alyssa! Hi! Hi! Did you miss me?"
The sexy siren of soho notices ordered food sitting out. She has not eaten dinner so she will step in and help herself. But before getting her well deserved share she sees that the pizza that has been ordered has come from a take out place she has previously requested her daddy not order from. This sets her off on one of her rants.
"Daddy, you ordered from Vito's again. I told you we should not order from there. I was out jogging and checked. It's close to a mile away. You order from there 8 or ten times a year. Do you know how much gas they use to bring that here? I'll tell you how much. Lots. That's doing damage to the ozone layers and everything. I hope you can live with yourself. I hope you can sleep at night knowing how much damage to the ozone layer, Daddy.
Next time order pizza from that Chinese place across the street. We can get it ourselves without driving and save the planet. Some genius you are daddy. Can't even order a pizza by yourself. Genius. Big whoop. You haven't even conquered the planet yet. I've been here 14 years and you've not conquered earth yet. So stupid.
The flashing sparks of the machines die down and Lark looks to her sisters for answers.
"He is at it again isn't he? Another Halloween scheme?"
--
*The Schemer powered down the machines....confident he had successfully created to perfect formula to use in his latest Halloween caper.*
It's perfect. Beyond all expectations!! This foil wrapped substance will give us exactly what I need to outwit so-called defenders of justice!! Nothing will stop it!!
*As the devices in his lab grew still....the sinister Schemer turned to face his daughters....greeting them with a smile of satisfaction.*
Ahhh...my darling Alyssa!! so heavenly to see you. And you my twins of evil!! You've come here to share in daddy's triumph? And Lark....not even you insane banter can bother me this evening. Help yourself to pizza...and my peppermint patties, girls. And then sit...I'll tell you of this latest scheme....then if you like...we'll watch a movie together.
--
"Hi Jess."
Morning Lady Larksalot.
Mia grabs a handful of the peppermint patties, then backs up to sit on one of the counters, Hattie takes a slice of pizza, figuring mom wasn't at home to scold her for eating it for breakfast.
"So...tin foil will foil heroes plans?"
Seems like things are all wrapper-ed up then, right? We can have a Halloween party?
"It candy fail?"
--
"Lady Larksalot! I like that! I so heart you two."
She is less charitable to her daddy.
"You are so not ruining Halloween for me. I am so not being turned into Zombie. I hate brains. I don't have any I hate them so much. Then that stupid Scheme where you turned all the kids to little Schemers/ That was totally disturbed. And lets not forget the famous pumpkins that going to unleash knockout gas on everyone then we could rob the city blind. How's that working for you, genius? Not so well as I recall. No what have you got? Killer candy? How is this going to help us take over?
--
*The Schemer sneered at his dopey daughter as she brought up several failed Halloween schemes from the past.*
the schemer children were not my fault....Landis created them. As for the pumpkins...I forgot people put candles in their jack o'lanterns...it overheated the control for the knockout gas. A simple oversight....it could have happened to anyone. As for the zombie scheme....that was Spectrum's fault...if that photonic floozie had hadn't interfered it would have worked perfectly.
But this Scheme won't fail. *He glanced at the twins,* No Halloween party yet. But we'll be celebrating soon! This caper is too sweet to miss. And yes....this tin foil will foil all who oppose us. For with is a special candy that will make life sweet for us!!
*more maniacal laughter ensued.*
--
"Soooo....special foil plus special candy equals world domination?"
Yes...yes...Hershey's has known this all along... KISSES WILL CONQUER THE WORLD!
"You so stole my bag of patties, Hattie." Mia chuckles, shaking her head before eating another.
I'm suddenly both relieved and worried that your other Halloween plans have failed, father? Schemer children? Knockout gas that wasn't heat tested?
--
"Why can't we just have a nice normal Halloween, daddy? No Schemes. We can have party and dress up. Or take Mattie and Hattie house to house so they can candy. Or go find a pumpkin patch that's really sincere and wait for the great pumpkin.
Or we can watch a movie. Something scary. Not like that those idiots you like to watch.
Like that guy from the original series that captain Jerk. He spends more time running after woman than he does running his ship. Then he leaves that poor vulcan guy mister spook to clean up his mess.
Spook. Do a sensor sweep of that M class planet we're appoarching. Scan for female lifeforms. Maybe there'll be someone there I can have sex with. Spook. You and the rest of the crew save the whales in the 20th century. I'll be busy seeing if I can have sex with the lady that runs the aquarium. Spook. This green lady is trying to hit me with a paternity suit. Use a vulcan mind meld on her and make her forget.
I don't even know why they call that show Star Trek. They should rename it space-prev.
But he's not even the worst captain. That Captain pickacard from next generation is worse. He's always in trouble. Oh help me, help me! the cardassians captured me and they're torturing me. Oh help me, help me. The borg captured me and are making me kill millions of people. Oh help me, help me. I'm stuck in ten forward and the baryon sweep is coming.
He's just a helpless old man. He should be in a wheel chair not the captain's chair. No wonder he played professor Xavier. At least that casting department knew his true calling.
Then there's loser from deep space nine, Captain crisco. He was so lame he didn't even get a ship of his own for the first three seasons of the show. Then what does he do? He leaves his command and his son behind to go hang out with some loser aliens that live in the entrance to the gamma quandrant. Creep. Nothing but dead beat dad if you ask me.
Then there's that very *friendly* person form Voyager, Captain subway. The federation give her one job. Find commander peyote and bust up the maquis. So what does she do? She finds that root chewing punk and makes him her first officer. Way to follow orders, subway! Then she's so retarded she ends up getting her ship lost in the delta sonic. How stupid is that?
Then there's that Captain Archway from enterprise. Loser! That's all I am saying. Loser!
Oh well, I guess watching that junk is better than those stupid Star wars movies with that Mankin Skywalker. He's a piece of work. Leaves his pregnant wife and for what? Not even some sexy biatch. He goes for some dried up walnut looking old man, emperor Ovaltine. Couple of sick sickos there.
And then there's that guy from the first set of movies, Hand Solo. Like that doesn't tell you what he's up to on those long voyages between star systems. Who's he kidding? Disgusting. And they show this porno stuff to children! You showed it to my sisters Mattie and Hattie, daddy. I hope you can live with yourself. I hope you can sleep at night knowing what you exposed your young daughters too.
--
*the Schemer merely glared at his daughter Jessica.* there's nothing wrong with Star Trek...or Star Wars. they are both brilliant...unlike you my dear Lark. You simply lack the mental ability to enjoy such grand production values. No shut up and listen.
We don't do normal Halloweens. Those are for human fools. We are above such mundane traditions. It's our job to wipe away the old and bring forth the new. A new era where mutants rule the earth and we the clique rule mutants. And this little candy treat is going to help us.
You see....I've manage to create here....the ultimate alcohol laden candy. Testing won't show the taint....I've disguised the taint to well. Fact is...you eat this candy....and it delivers a blast to your liver....so to speak It becomes pure alcohol within the system of those that eat it. 10 times greater than the legal limit. Enough to cause even the most sober person to pass out. In other words....I've created what man has long for over the centuries....a good fifty cent drunk!!
--
"Soooo...we're going to get a bunch of kids drunk enough to cause serious alcohol poisoning?"
Eww. Kids could die if they eat candy? That's all levels of wrong, dad.
Mia looks at the pattie she was about to eat and double checks to make sure it didn't have one of her father's sinister snack wrappers on it.
Hattie just takes another bite of her pizza, wondering what made her father come up with this novel idea.
--
Lark frowns when he daddy tells her to shut up but when she hears what her father has in mind.
"That's mean. So totally mean. You could hurt people, daddy. Maybe kids. It's so not right. The twins are right. You should dump this stupid plan and use the money for something else. Like giving it to me!"
She munches on her pizza with one and leans on the wall with the other.
"So what happens if kids eat this and get sick daddy. Do you have an antidote? I don't want anyone dying. "
There is a ring at the door Lark goes to answer it.
"That's for me. I will be right back."
And she is back in just a few minutes after paying the delivery man at the door and having the robot helpers bring in two large crates.
--
It's not mean!! Who care what happens to a bunch of apple pinching street human kids. they tend to grow up into adults. And adult humans are our natural foe. They must be wiped out...or at least controlled to make the won't do the same to us!!
*He looks to his two darling daughters Mia and Hattie.*
Surely you both can understand.
*After the ring at the doorbell....the schemer merely shook his head. Lark was up to something...and when she arrived with the crates, he was cert*
What the devil is this?? How are dare you upstage me!
--
"How do we know only human children will eat them? Is the package going to say 'Only safe for human consumption'?"
I think Mom would have smacked you for endangering children, dad.
Both girls raise a brow as their considerably Larky sister rushes from the room to answer the door.
"Can you tell what it is, Hattie?"
Not really...I'm just picking up big boxes. Maybe we can send her to Atlantis in one of them...
They turn their attention back towards their father, Mia setting the candy back down, not really wanting to test it anymore...thinking a drunk superhuman would not be a good thing, instead she grabs a piece of pizza and flicks the olives off of it before taking a bite.
Hattie moves over to her father's computer and starts skimming through the information as to figure out how exactly the candy worked.
--
Because I intend on warning all clique within the clique not to touch the stuff....and I'm hoping that before I begin the mass production process....I can make it have little or no effect on mutants.....thus sparing anyone a nasty headache in the morning...or worse. But then I can't exactly heed FDA regulations on this one now can I? Then the jig...as they say...would be up.
*His gaze shifted toward Hattie.* What are you doing?? Be careful.....there's information on that computer I've not saved to an independent disc yet.
--
"Just warning the Clique? I'm sure Boomer wouldn't eat the candy, she's trying to keep her slim figure. As far as the FDA, there's nothing saying they won't try to test it...just call it an import from Europe, or even more sense, China and people won't even notice probably. Do you have multiple flavors, or are you just sticking with...you know, chocolate?"
Mia moves over and picks at the wrapped candy, looking it over.
I'm looking over the chemical instances that you have on the candy, father. It's not like I intend on changing the chemical make up...or start deleting things at random to foil the plot before it can even begin. Though, I did set the auto-backup system on here to transmit the information to the portable flash drive sitting over there on the counter.
She motions over to the drive with the little green blinking light on it.
--
*the Schemer was impressed with how the twins seemed so quick to adapt to the mode of scheming. Clearly there were big things in their future.*
Auto-backup....good thinking!! Boomer was already involved in one of my past Halloween schemes. Her family did not take kindly to it. Spoiled sports. As for the candy itself....oh yes...I have multiple flavors. Spearmint...peppermint....so far those....I'm considering others. Is there anything you can think of darlings....and flavor you would prefer??
The formula I used is on file, Mia. *He points to a computer terminal with a green fedora screen saver.* It's listed in there under the file....punch drunk.
--
"Honestly, if you wanted it to target the more adult human crowd, I would think it...punny, to put it in butterscotch candies."
Hattie shakes her head at her sister's comment, then skims over the Punch drunk file, snickering silently as she reads the info. Punch drunk on butterscotch. Well, I don't know many kids that eat the butterscotch candies, well, besides me. But if you do only minty flavors, you would limit the number of kids eating them on that notion alone.
"It would have to be something that can be eaten quickly I'd think...though, sucking on a butterscotch would deliver it slowly to allow the drunkenness to build, as opposed to stuffing one's face with chocolate as some are prone to do." Mia eyes her sister a bit.